FROZEN IN TIME

I'm bored and weary, at times on the brink of insanity

Being this way for the longest time

Feeling desolate, despondent, and lost 

Feeling wretched and damned at a cost

I am locked in this small space

Enough for just me 

Not daring to scream out loud

As I whipped myself scarred

I long to break free from this cycle

This chokehold I'm in

I have only you to depend on

I have to be brave enough for us

I long to feel the sugary sand under my feet

Fill my lungs with clean, fresh air

Sense your warm touch caressing my pale skin

To flourish, to thrive, to feel so alive 

How long I have been frozen, I couldn't tell

I know I should stand on my feet

Take a step, perhaps two

Keep going, even if I stumble and fall

The door is open, inviting and alluring

Can I do it? Can I make it?

MY UNPREDICTABLE LIFE

Sadness, the world within my mind 

Twists and turns with flaming rage,

Fear, self-pity, blame and guilt

Isolate - spirit in a cage.

Fear will scratch the surface

Guilt shall consume my soul,

Blame eventually follows 

Self pity devours my whole.

Empty pages hold the future

Unaware what tomorrow brings,

Yet to feel the beauty of the day

Is what gives hope its wings.

Drink life from a half-filled cup

Swallow with dignity and pride,

Worth not measured by the exterior

But what lives and grows inside.

Surrender to a glorious sunrise

And shadows that may fall between,

For even within a droplet of rain

Magic and miracles can be seen ...

* When life faces with a illness and traumas we can shred our life to pieces. We face every emotion known. Sadness, anger, rage, fear, guilt, blame and perhaps even self pity.
These emotions will isolate us from the rest of the world. They zap our energy and steal our will to live. 
Until .... we decide they will not control us. There is a beautiful world out there ... and even though it is so hard to see it when we have illness and traumas. We must look deep within and find the strength to fight * 

MY LIFE

My barren life

I could be wrong,

As I have always been.

Treading this less travelled path,

I have some unanswered questions within.

Some black and white memories,

Some wounded dreams.

Feels like.........

Dragging this body from centuries,

Tired of getting up after every hurdle,

I laugh with my eyes bleeding.

Can I get some rest? Some rest on your shoulder?

I could be alone,

As I have always been...........................