Let Me Sleep !!!!!!!!!!!!

As the gentle night breeze
Sweep the land that is deep in sleep
I close my eyes and
Try to sleep;

As the stars became brighter and brighter,
My eyes refused to close
Sleep, just ran away
Into the darkness of the land;

The twinkling of the stars,
The warmth of the air
Disturbed only by the
Muted sounds of the heart beat!

Tried counting from one to hundred;
Tried reading a book;
Tried to count the number of times
The stars twinkled in the sky;

Still, my eyes refused to close,
Sleep would not engulf the senses;
When stillness speaks,
Everything else just listens !!!!!!!

Love You..................Miles Apart !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sitting at home,

Everything is fine,

As the days pass by

One by one,

Some long, some slow;

I talk to myself quiet and low,

Elegies of my heart and soul…

A shiver, a sigh, soft words whispered in the dark,

My senses are mixed already, unable to differentiate

Between a sound or a smell or a touch or a taste;

I keep dreaming of a time,

My fingers intertwined

With you, an everlasting

Joy of time, heart skipping

A beat here and there;

as I sit here

Thinking sweet thoughts of you

Lustful images make my heart

Palpitate uncontrollably;

Trembling uncontrollably

The heat continues to rise

As I close my eyes and see

You standing before me;

I open up my eyes to find

That you are nowhere around

I feel a wave of sadness

Crash upon the shores of my heart;

As I lie here obsessed with the thought of you,

Hoping it will all be over soon and,

Waiting patiently for the day

When I can hold you in my arms

And never have to let you go,

I realize love is a strange thing indeed !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love You..................Miles Apart !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Sitting at home,

Everything is fine,

As the days pass by

One by one,

Some long, some slow;

I talk to myself quiet and low,

Elegies of my heart and soul…

A shiver, a sigh, soft words whispered in the dark,

My senses are mixed already, unable to differentiate

Between a sound or a smell or a touch or a taste;

I keep dreaming of a time,

My fingers intertwined

With you, an everlasting

Joy of time, heart skipping

A beat here and there;

as I sit here

Thinking sweet thoughts of you

Lustful images make my heart

Palpitate uncontrollably;

Trembling uncontrollably

The heat continues to rise

As I close my eyes and see

You standing before me;

I open up my eyes to find

That you are nowhere around

I feel a wave of sadness

Crash upon the shores of my heart;

As I lie here obsessed with the thought of you,

Hoping it will all be over soon and,

Waiting patiently for the day

When I can hold you in my arms

And never have to let you go,

I realize love is a strange thing indeed !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whom To Thank ?????

A body is given me—what shall I do with it,
So whole and so mine?

For the quiet joy of breathing and living,
Whom, tell me, should I thank?

I am both a gardener and a flower I am, too;
In the prison of the world, I am not alone.

On the window panes of eternity, settled
My breathing, my warmth.

A design shall be imprinted on them,
Unrecognizable since not long ago.

Let the dregs of the moment drip down—
The sweet design cannot be crossed out.

LET ME WALK ALONE.................

If only it were so simple,
To cruise through life smelling roses;
But the obstacles blacken the countryside,
And I unwittingly crush them beneath my boots.

Dreams sustain me through the madness;
Goals give a finish line to my race.
Yet they change with every turn, around every wall,
And remain elusive throughout the quest.

Mistakes are made, and regrets are my luggage;
I shall drag them with me to slow me down.
The victories are flashes of light, sudden and unlasting, which allow me
To glimpse the road ahead before darkness descends.

Love is sweet, and it is the bread that keeps me alive.
Over and over it fills me up,to live.........
The person whom I love shape my destinies and my strengths,
Yet leaves me( sometimes) cold and alone in the darkness.

There are others trying to race to the end;
Occasionally, I bump into one or two.
The bonds we form help us down the path less lonely
But eventually, I lose those friends in the darkness.

Alone is not a bad way to be;
It clears my head and focuses on the journey.
Cherish the short intervals during the quest I have with others,
But I am prepare to walk alone in the darkness..............

Will you come with me??????????

DOES LOVE REALLY CONQUER ALL........????

Do you believe that true love between two people is all that takes to be able to defeat the problems that may occur in a relationship (and also in other areas of life)? Or is love sometimes not enough?

My own reasoning is that love makes us want to commit to another person and find a way to overcome any obstacle that might come our way, so that way, love is a powerful motivation and one might say it does conquer all....................

I believe in Miracles and dreams that will come true,
And I believe in happiness And love, through and through
I believe that when we cry our tears are not in vain,
And when we’re sad and lonely someone knows that we’re in pain.

I believe that when we laugh a sparkle starts to shine,
And before we know these sparks will spread
From more hearts than just mine.
I believe the gifts we have are there for you to share
And when you give them from the heart, the whole world knows you care.

I believe that if you give, even just to one,
That gift will grow in magnitude before the day is done.
I believe that comfort comes from giving part of me,
And if I share with others, there’s more for all so see.
I believe that love is still the greatest gift of all,
And when it’s given from the heart, Love will conquer all.

Once upon a time there was an island where all the feelings lived; happiness,sadness, knowledge, and all the others, including love.
One day it was announced to all of the feelings that the island was going to sink to the bottom of the ocean. So all the feelings prepared their boats to leave. Love was the only one that stayed. She wanted to preserve the island paradise until the last possible moment. When the island was almost totally under, Love decided it was time to leave. She began looking for someone to ask for help.

Just then Richness was passing by in a grand boat. Love asked, "Richness, Can I come with you on your boat?"
Richness answered, " I'm sorry, but there is a lot of silver and gold on my boat and there would be no room for you anywhere." Then Love decided to ask Vanity for help who was passing in a beautiful vessel.
Love cried out, "Vanity, help me please."

"I can't help you", Vanity said, "You are all wet and will damage my beautiful boat."
Next, Love saw Sadness passing by. Love said, "Sadness, please let me go with you."
Sadness answered, "Love, I'm sorry, but, I just need to be alone now." Then, Love saw Happiness.

Love cried out, " Happiness, please take me with you." But Happiness was so overjoyed that he didn't hear Love calling to him. Love began to cry.

Then, she heard a voice say, "Come Love, I will take you with me." It was an elder. Love felt so blessed and overjoyed that she forgot to ask the elder his name. When they arrived on land the elder went on his way. Love realized how much she owed the elder.

Love then found Knowledge and asked, "Who was it that helped me?" "It was Time", Knowledge answered.
"But why did Time help me when no one else would?", Love asked.

Knowledge smiled and with deep wisdom and sincerity, answered, "Because only Time is capable of understanding What Love is."

SORROW...............

sorrow the seat is on heap of shattered hopes
still you accompany the deserted souls
sorrow you are the truth on passage of time
still you accompany defeated minds
sorrow you have nothing to hold for morrows
still you reveals the hollowness of life
sorrow you holds the secrets of dark
still you awaken the spirit in the dying man
sorrow you when words fail their expression
still you prevail the onslaught of cultures
sorrow you flood the life with tears
still you provide ways to try for happiness
sorrow you make even dull heads philosophers
still you remain elusive to searh or research

Dedicated to my friend Ravi ........who is in hospital after an accident. Get well soon Ravi....

A GRATITUDE TO MY JOKER..............

You mean so much to me

You truly have been a blessing to me

You are my hero and always will be

Your love has kept me alive

Your compassion has helped me to strive

Thank you for being who you are

You knew that I have been through a hell

But you helped me mend my old scars

And you listened to the secrets

Thank you for opening my eyes

.............and finding my heart

You encouraged me to spread my wings and fly

You honestly judged me,right from the start

You never let me forget that I am so strong

I am so happy to see that,after so long

thank you for being there for me when I needed to cry

And for always finding a way to make me smile

You helped me to change my lifestyle

Because of you,I learned how to get through each day

Just letting me know that everything will soon be okay

You taught me ways to handle situations on my own

Now you can see how much I have grown

I could have never done it without you

I once thought that it was impossible

But now I believe I can do whatever I want to do

You helped me learn that anything is possible

Thank you for setting me free...............

God knew I needed someone,I'm so grateful He answered my plea

Words could never being to convey

How much it means to me,that I have you to helped me to see clearly

And to know that you are by my side and will help guide me my way

I love you dearly

Simply thank you for everything

YOU OPENED THE CLOSED DOOR...........

Behind a closed door I lay,

My emotions locked up inside me.

No one seems to understand the problem at bay.

I fight like a raging bull to stay sane,

But I get pulled down by the gray shadow of fear.

I cry out loud as I feel the stinging pain,

Running through my cold shallow vanes.

I clench my pale hand around my phone

The thing I have to remind you.

My tears run down my sickened face

As they splash on the bodies of the beloved.

I wonder if I ever escape this place

To join a new fate.

Then one day behind that closed door,

Your hand reaches to me for comfort.

It rests on my shoulder,

To help me remove fears boulder.

That hand gave me light in my sea of darkness.

I realize that life must go on,

And that there are others who care deeply about me.

I place that tear soaked picture in my heart,

I say my final goodbye to all my fears.

As you open that closed door.

**written when i was suffering and going through the hell.

I Run Away Because You Showed Me How......................

Latter rains perfume
Sprinkled upon her doubt
Folded up in a suitcase
Of a life she can't get out

The crucifix upon her wrist
Her persecuted bones
Flesh hanging off her frame
A life without a home

Pinning her life upon a cross
She sat within the ground
Conjuring up a hell
From which she cant get down

Leaking sadistically
From the Ora of her frame
Hanging on in her bones
In alcoholics tame

Gypsy satires
Link her hurried bones
Moving her precisely
A thousand miles from home

Killing herself slowly
From herself she tends to run
But no one can blame her
fate showed her how its done

Star-Lights in her eyes
Of dreams yet not fulfilled
Hopes and inspirations
Her fate helped her kill

Inhaling liquid flame
Abandonment ablaze
Haunted by the demon
Of a fate that never stayed


Dedicated To The Fate I never knew:
*I Run Away Because You Showed Me How*

Love Is Missing You Whenever You’re Apart............

"Heading towards the limit of the height
as if I am going to touch the sky
Thrilling journey, risky path
I could feel amazing with blowing mind
and throbbing heart.
Just gone vanished all perplexity and fear
because always you were there..................................."

I always wonder that when I miss you, is it because I love you? I keep on fighting with myself that what’s the reason for missing you?Or, do I want you always with me when I need you to lean on?

Whatever the reason is, it’s very nice feeling to miss you. I keep on thinking about you whole day and night and start imagining you near me.People ask me,why do i miss you? How do i miss you? I feel it’s the sweet pain and I love missing you..........because while missing you I somehow feel warm inside because I feel you close in my heart....and makes me feel complete......

People often hide their feelings in front of the person they are missing. We must keep our ego aside and convey our feelings to that person. Life is too short; if you love or you miss someone do let them know. If that person understands you, it would never ruin your relationship.............

I wish that you were here or that I were there, or that we were together anywhere!!!!!!!!!!!!

Each day I wait with bated breath
For a call or a message from you...
Though my phone rings frequently,
Messages from you are but few.

I know it is asking too much
To be in touch all the time...
But my heart just refuses to listen
And your absence makes me pine.

The few moments we spend together
Seem to get over so very fast...
I wish those times would never end
That they would just last and last.

The times when you are not in touch
Are just so hard for me to bear...
Silent tears stream down my cheeks
For you so much I care.

Each time we have to say bye
Brings my heart so much pain...
I don't know what next time will bring
The mere thought drives me insane.

Those simple messages and calls
I look forward to each and every day...
For it shows that you think of me
Whatever may come your way.

So even if you are really busy
With over a million things to do...
Try and send me a message or a call
Just to say I miss you too.

I..................Me.........&............Myself.........

I flinch when the rain falls on the pavement,
I scowl when things don't go my way,
I cry when people just don't get it,
I lie when I am honestly not okay,

I keep my head up no matter what,
I throw the first punch if needed,
I glare when people are irritating,
I smile at sappy sayings,

I giggle when things are becoming much too serious,
I tremble when I'm afraid,
I cross my eyes and make funny faces to make my sis laugh at me,

I write things down when I feel broken,
I sing when I don't feel loved, even when I do,
I read my diary and stay up late so I can see everything from start to finish,

I would rather be fashionably late than drastically early,
I eat chocolate when I am dumped,
I watch chick flicks when I am angry,
I eat ice cream only when I am alone,

I would give everything to another person if it meant I could save their life,
I try to be rational in traffic, I end up honking my horn,
I am misunderstood, to figure it out reverse psychology works best,
I overreact on so many things being an emotional disaster,

My life is complicated and so am I,
Though sometimes no one seems to care..........

Miles Apart................I Am Here For You !!!!!

When I walk with you,I feel my journey to be complete,

When I hug you close to my heart,I can listen to your silence,

When I talk to you,I feel I am free from all bonding,

Nothing to lose,nothing to gain,

Just be in your arms and feel your warmth,

The soft care of your touch,

Make me feel I am the only one in your world.

We are far apart but I can feel your existence everywhere,

Now and then,in the wind,in the trees,in silence,in my room,

And solely in my soul which is lonely without you,

In my mind,my eyes,

Which is always in search of you,

I know I am far away,

but not so far.

That you cannot hold my hand,

In your whisper.

If your eyes are upon the stars

In the crystalline darkness,

I will become the moon,

And the light shall guide you.

If you rest upon the ground,

In the warmth........

I will become the grass

And embrace you.

If you turn outside

In the wetness

I will become the rain.

If you free in the air,

In the sunny day,

I will become the sun,behind the clouds

And smile for you.

Kiss your forehead

And tell you..........

Just sense me and I will be there.

I know I need you,and I am missing you

But I want to be with you

Only with you.

Forever and ever after.....................................

CALL ME BACK .......................

If you knew it would be the last time That you would see me fall asleep, would you tuck me in more tightly, And pray the God my soul to keep? If you knew it would be the last time That you would see me walk out the door, would you give me a hug and kiss, And call me back for once more? If you knew it would be the last time you would hear my voice lifted up in praise, would you video tape each action and word, So you could play them back day after day? If you knew it would be the last time, could you spare an extra minute or two, To stop and say "you love me,?" But just in case you might be wrong, And today is all you get, Would you like to say how much you love me? Tomorrow is not promised to anyone, Young or old alike, And today may be the last chance You get to hold your loved one tight. So if you're waiting for tomorrow, Why not do it today? For if tomorrow never comes, You'll surely regret the day. That you didn't take that extra time For a smile, a hug, or a kiss, And you were too busy to grant her What turned out to be her one last wish. So hold your loved ones close today, And whisper in her ear, That you love her very much, and You'll always hold her dear. Take time to say "I'm sorry," "Please forgive me," "thank you" or "it's okay". And if tomorrow never comes, You'll have no regrets about today.

LONELY EVENING..............

The dreary Evening has set in,
The Sun is on its downward descend;
The birds swarm to their cozy nests,
And I sit here alone in the silence of the dusk.

I know not what to think about,
The topics are too many to say the least,
But a face keeps flashing in my wary mind
Just wish people could see what a beauty he is.

Those beautiful eyes have the depth of the seas,
The endless silent space beseeches one to wander away;
Ah how do I explain his beauty!
One has to see it to understand, As I did.

The person is miles apart,
But he remains with me.........always,
When the lonely wind blows and the sun begins to set,
I begin to wonder is something amiss
Or is this what was meant to be?

Lots of people are in love.
Many a times I wonder how love would feel;
years have passed and I realize it now,Love is what I feel when I'am with you.
As I walk through those lonely roads and the wind touches my face,
I begin to yearn for love again, love from you again........ once more.

NEVER LEAVE ME ALONE............................

The light of the room is blazing at its best

Yet condensed darkness around

No birds chirping in the woodland

And silence inbound

Yet condensed

The cry of broken dreams

The sounds of the favorite voice

The tune of the ever desired smile

Buzzing like echo coming back time to time.

The stranger white clouds

Playing hide and seek with the moon

Yet the world is filled with melancholy

Raining of tears from the eye

Drops of sadness trickling down through the cheeks

No sniffle only rolling down of silent tears heavy and salty

Someone in the earth is sad and lonely.

The abandoned joy

The discarded commitments

The acute loneliness

Explore the world of melancholy.

The present is miserable

Seems like future doesn't exist

All there reigns is the past

None can edit.

Heart beating as always used to

Lung pumping as ever it do

Blood is red as usual

Only one thing missing

The grief is severe yet overcome,

just there is no feeling.

A sharp knife, a bottle of poison,

A spiral rope hanging from the ceiling,

A gallon of gasoline

There plenty of options out there for choosing.

All thoughts are centered

On composing the moment forthcoming

Now there is a future

There is a dream

The dead one can't come back

But the alive-ones can choose going.

(The poem is ended.

But I really can't conclude it.

My heart is not satisfied so the following verses are added.)

Step by step

Going ahead, the option of gasoline has been chosen

The body is wet, only one step left

Setting the fire on the head

Time seems to be stopped

Silence and darkness

Fire set but no pain

No warmth, no casualty yet.

On my surprise a cold hand in the forehead

Calling me to wake up

It is evening; not an idle time to lie in bed.

I can’t speak

Immediately a drop of tear

Start rolling down the cheek

I embrace you firmly

In the warmth of your bosom

Few words come out of my lip

“Never leave me alone,

I can’t live”.

WHY?????????????????

I pause midway in the in the whirl,
Of deadlines, things undone,
And average the sadness and joys -
There remains only loneliness,
Of which I see no cure,
No bitter palliatives, no anodyne.

I remain in life’s journey,
Like a loner sitting depressed,
On solitary park benches, or,
Standing in balconies, staring,
Loneliness gnawing at my mind,
As hungry ants at a grain of food.
Often in life’s vicious lanes,
In lonesome moments,
It’s my failures I ponder,
Not trasient joys and victories,
I do not remember other's courage,
Only their faults, and habits.

When in each passing lonely moment,
I count the millions of joyous seconds,
I was alive to witness this world, and,
Hurtful mimetic thoughts that passed me by,
My loneliness vanishes, I scream,
“I live; I am alive this lonely moment.”

MY BIRTHDAY................

A birthday is just another day,

young of mind, and youthful looks...

Another year older,

the world seems a bit colder.

Yet my heart still burns,

and for love it forever yearns.

Another year older,

I grow even bolder.

Life is for us to learn from,

as calculated as a mathematical sum.

Another year older,

hurting blazes now just smolder.

Letting go of past rage and pain,

living life and feeling sane.

Another year older,

a tear on your shoulder.

Life is always been tough,

my tear is of joy not because I'm sad.

Another day older,

more pages added to my folder.

I'm glad of whom I am today,

I would not have myself any other way.

So don't mind that I write my own birthday rhyme,

I've lived through my life up till this time.

I think it is safe to say,

that things will go as planned His way.

He's got more for me yet,

It'll be even better I bet.

Another year older,

and I am in His debt

VOICE OF A COMMON PEOPLE !!!!!!!

Dear Sir

No, you do not amaze me…!!! Because I know fasting has always been used as an insidious way by many of your kind. Of course, you have termed it as fighting for the common people, fighting for democracy, bringing in pro-people policies, fighting against corruption etc. Whatever be the reason, you have done it and will continue to do so….!!!

Gandhiji used it as a means of Satyagraha, to have the demands of the Indian met against an oppressive British regime. Fasting has been used a very effective political tool by many........like,The DMK patriarch Mr. Karunanidhi is one of the increasing popular politicians who have always used this tool.Recently, one was K Chandrasekhar Rao, when he took the ‘Fast unto Death’ demanding for Separate Telangana to be cut out from the state Andhra Pradesh.The grand old man of Maharashtra, ex-army man Anna Hazare made the whole of India come out on the streets when he took fast unto death against corruption. Many joined him as well, demanding for the Jan Lokpal Bill. Many social activists, intelligentsia, middle class Indian men and women and even you supported him. But the fate of the Lokpal bill today is akin to a pendulum….!!!

The latest addition and perhaps one of the most hyped ones is yours. you are now spearheading the movement against ‘Black money’ dumped in the Swiss banks. In such situations, the government will have no choice but to give in to your demands and pacify you with high but empty promises. We Indians have always been obsessed with laws and policies. But we fail to realize that the problem arises because of faulty implementation.But, I know you shall achieve your demands like many others have. You will make the Indian government bow before you.

You are the owner of a Scottish island, but claims to represent the poor masses,you run a profitable business selling Ayurvedic medicines, and could have a sales agenda; you enjoy support from communal and corrupt groups, which could quietly hijack your cause for votes; your campaign makes unreasonable demands that cannot be met overnight; and your rabble-rousing could create law and order problems.

Thus, you fail to raise any interest in me and I recommend you stick to ‘fasting’ to achieve as the yogi’s believe- PURIFICATION……………..!!!

Yours Sincerely
A ‘cynical’ Indian

ALONE.................

Another day has passed to spend alone, I see, with just my memories for company.

Long hours to fill, an empty room, and sadness fills me as I roam.

I wander through the empty rooms, feel your presence…. Try to push away the gloom.

No one to share a word or joke, no one to hold my hands or hear a kind word spoke.

No one to share my thoughts…… So many things that were left unsaid.

Too much time to sit and think, too much time to sink,

Into hopelessness and pain…… If only I could have you back again.

There are two faces now to wear each day, two ways to live my life, it seems.

The outside world expects a smile, a pleasant face…. How’s your health and dreams?

I value every little word that’s said, they help to fill the empty spaces left ahead.

Then inside, all alone once more, I sit and watch the clock and door.

For time hangs so heavy now, and creases cover face and brow.

The phone sits silently and sulks, the mail box empty, walk, walk,

Around the room, do odd jobs, check the clock, then…. Oh god! Is it only half past two?(2AM)

I can't get the car out, drive, but where? It’s just as lonely everywhere.

People hurry by as if I don’t exist somehow, another lost face in the crowd.

Ah well, at last it’s time for bed, time to rest my aching head.

Another day looms up ahead, more hours to fill…. Fills me with dread!

I AM HERE..............................

I sit on the steps of my air castle

Drink espresso black...

Putting my taste buds to test

My lips I lick...

With the computer on my lap--

Quietly I wonder:

Into your dreams I click.

Some words and the voices

In the dark echo back.

Just like on a white canvas

A red heart--

You add colour to my life,

Know how to love me;

I am your Hermit Crab!

Heavens possess this crying tool--

Thirst quenching liquid

I call it water,

You call it rain.

In a heavy outpour

It's coming down like a melody,

A beautiful refrain.

You are more than an illusion,

Or a dream, I could not depart from.

Since you are travelling again

I had to tell you fast

How I am missing you

Do you?

About us, I won't tell anyone( if you don't want)

Our secret is in a folder

Marked 'delete not...'

It will be well kept.

Between the pages love is hiding

No one will ever know

It's depth.

If you find a new horizon

To keep company with,

And it's not the same shade

As mine,

When the voices in the dark

Again become crystal clear

Just click: 'I am online.'

You will find me here.....................

LONELY TEARS I CRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

These Lonely tears I cry…

No one truly knows why.

Missing pieces I can’t seem to find…

feeling as though I am in some sort of bind!!

This pain is all too real…

and I no longer want to feel!!

Tired, so tired of the pain…

for it has truly begun to drain.

My emotions are running so high…

not knowing what to do anymore, I just sigh.

My life has taken a large toll on me…

and I for one don’t want to continue to see!!

I am lost in this haze that surrounds me…

And all I ever wanted was to flee!!

From this wretched pain, this life of mine…

for I am the only one that knows whether or not I will be fine!!

I can’t go back in time, only a mere dream…

cause my reality is something that one does

Not want to face, so it seems