Behind a closed door I lay,
My emotions locked up inside me.
No one seems to understand the problem at bay.
I fight like a raging bull to stay sane,
But I get pulled down by the gray shadow of fear.
I cry out loud as I feel the stinging pain,
Running through my cold shallow vanes.
I clench my pale hand around my phone
The thing I have to remind you.
My tears run down my sickened face
As they splash on the bodies of the beloved.
I wonder if I ever escape this place
To join a new fate.
Then one day behind that closed door,
Your hand reaches to me for comfort.
It rests on my shoulder,
To help me remove fears boulder.
That hand gave me light in my sea of darkness.
I realize that life must go on,
And that there are others who care deeply about me.
I place that tear soaked picture in my heart,
I say my final goodbye to all my fears.
As you open that closed door.
**written when i was suffering and going through the hell.